Scratch That

Well, apparently I, once again, have spoken (and I use the term loosely here) too soon.

Chris and I had settled on what I thought were dates that were agreeable to the most important people (read: immediate family and wedding party).

Wrong.

This is an excellent example of why people are so fond of saying that weddings are stressful.

Chris and I have a very narrow window of time in which we can get married based on our own lives and what we would like.

Once we factor in other important information - for example, my best friend's wedding, which will be occurring right at the end of the time frame in which Chris and I have been considering dates - we had narrowed ourselves down to no more than 6 possible dates...a few of which are undesirable for their own reasons.

We picked the one that we liked best, believing that we had gotten all the necessary information.

We were wrong.

And.

Well.

Some of the aforementioned important people were polite about voicing their conflicts...while others were not.

Right now, I wish to not stir up more trouble because I really do care for these people a great deal...but I also wish to be honest. Thus, no names, and I'll be as vague as I can to protect people. I will also say that, if you think you are one of the people to whom I am referring and you don't like what's being said or you're worried about our relationship, know this: I will or have already voiced this to you and/or worked through it on my own (with Chris, of course) and it will be ok...but I was (and still am) upset about it.

Done.

It just hurts to feel like what should be one of the happiest days of my life is beginning to turn into a battleground and an avenue through which others may work out their problems.

The bulk of the fallout happened yesterday, Saturday.

In the last 36 hours I have probably cried for a solid 6 (and yeah, ok, I do cry - when things upset me I definitely cry).

And it sucks.

I want to make sure the important people are there and it saddens me that others don't trust me enough to be mature about bringing up their concerns directly to me in a thoughtful, empathic, mature way. Is that so much to ask?

Maybe it is...

The parties in question were aware of the possibility of us choosing the date we had and did not voice any concern prior to yesterday.

Also, we chose that date specifically, with purpose, and no one thought to ask us about that.

Bothersome.

I want our wedding to be beautiful and joyous and fun.

I do not want to look at the date and think about the subterfuge that occurred in choosing it.

I want this not to happen again.

Just...happiness...and understanding would be great.

Oh yeah!

And please forgive my rant -- it's needed, maybe it'll help me avoid more tears.

On the positive side of things, having this happen has definitely required me and Chris to make sure that we are on the same team, on the same side, with the same goals. That wasn't necessarily simple for a variety of reasons, but we're there.

Now we just have to move forward with our plan in figuring out what the actual wedding date will be.

(Also, we're probably changing the date for the engagement party, but that's not drama....yet anyways.)